When the bright are REALLY daft (1)

Don't you just love it when folks we have every reason to believe are intelligent say things that are just plain daft?  I don't know if you saw the news items recently about 'books' found containing - among other things - 'the first portrait of Jesus'?  The books - about 70n in all - are no bigger than a credit card, made out of lead, bound with wire, and - crucially - sealed shut.  Dr Margaret Barker (former President of the Society for Old Testament Study' and therefore very, very bright, obviously) is reported as saying 'The Book of Revelation tells of a sealed book that was opened only by the Messiah.' 


Well, indeed it does.  Here's (some of) the relevant bit:

And I saw a mighty angel proclaiming in a loud voice, "Who is worthy to break the seals and open the scroll?"    But no one in heaven or on earth or under the earth could open the scroll or even look inside it.   I wept and wept because no one was found who was worthy to open the scroll or look inside.   Then one of the elders said to me, "Do not weep! See, the Lion of the tribe of Judah, the Root of David, has triumphed. He is able to open the scroll and its seven seals."   Then I saw a Lamb, looking as if it had been slain, standing in the centre of the throne, encircled by the four living creatures and the elders. He had seven horns and seven eyes, which are the seven spirits of God sent out into all the earth.   He came and took the scroll from the right hand of him who sat on the throne.   And when he had taken it, the four living creatures and the twenty-four elders fell down before the Lamb. Each one had a harp and they were holding golden bowls full of incense, which are the prayers of the saints.   And they sang a new song: "You are worthy to take the scroll and to open its seals, because you were slain, and with your blood you purchased men for God from every tribe and language and people and nation.   You have made them to be a kingdom and priests to serve our God, and they will reign on the earth."   Then I looked and heard the voice of many angels, numbering thousands upon thousands, and ten thousand times ten thousand. They encircled the throne and the living creatures and the elders.   In a loud voice they sang: "Worthy is the Lamb, who was slain, to receive power and wealth and wisdom and strength and honour and glory and praise!"   Then I heard every creature in heaven and on earth and under the earth and on the sea, and all that is in them, singing: "To him who sits on the throne and to the Lamb be praise and honour and glory and power, for ever and ever!"   The four living creatures said, "Amen," and the elders fell down and worshiped.  I watched as the Lamb opened the first of the seven seals...

... and then a large part of Revelation is concerned with the opening of the seals.  Tell me, intelligent reader - does this look as if it might, possibly, refer to seventy leaden, credit-card scrolls?  It does?  Then it might also refer to seventy orange carrots!  After all, anything's possible when you've decided that the text means only what you want it to mean...